Challenge: Don’t Give Up, Stick at things! Charity: The Natashas Project Total £ accrued: £18 Status: What a month to choose for this challenge!
The Fourth Challenge: Not Giving Up
Small Victories
This month began with a hangover in Ipswich as I attempted, between the thumps in my temples, to win a hen party Bake-Off. And somehow, with minimal assistance from myself, my team won! I still bask in the glory- just because I can! And just so the gloating may continue (for my total contribution of grating an orange or two), here is the winning cake.
Okay, I did also donate what was left of my brain power into these juicy strawberry chocolatey delights. Let’s just say not all of them made it to the cake…
And I thought to myself, as I started drinking prosecco to celebrate our 3-tiered victory, maybe this month wouldn’t be that hard after all. I mean… I didn’t give up on drinking despite my hangover!
Emotional Marathon
Okay, so I soon realised that this month would be far from easy as I faced many challenges. Challenges like trying to sell all of my furniture from my old flat having been given two day’s notice that my ex was moving out. Like trying to stay motivated at work when so many negative messages were flying around. Like facing my fears and deciding to take unpaid time off work to travel (update on that below).
But the killer for me was having to say goodbye to my boyfriend at Gatwick airport as he left to begin his 5 month journey from Mexico to Canada.
I have never really had to say a goodbye like that (other than when my best friend, Marcelo, left to go and live in Australia for four years! Sad times… but he’s back now woop!) and it wasn’t just the goodbye that was hard, it’s hard now too. For those of you who, like me previously, have no idea what it feels like to have a partner leave for a long period of time I would describe it like running an emotional marathon. And unfortunately for me, having been through quite a lot in the last year, I feel pretty (emotionally) unfit.
With all of this going on, I’ve never felt like giving up more than I did this month.
Update
I set myself a target at the end of my last post and I’m pleased to say that I did it!! I booked my flights at the end of that week, and subsequently have now booked a tour and bought a backpack. Ahhhh!
So for those who are curious this is my itinerary:
3rd June fly to Bangkok
5th June Tour from Bangkok through Cambodia and end up in Vietnam
Make my own way up Vietnam and into Laos
Make my own way back to Bangkok for my flight home on 15th July
16th July fly to New York
Road trip down East Coast (via Maryland and Virginia to see family and attend a Wedding) ending in Miami!
21st August fly from Miami to Portland
Meet Ryan!
Road trip up to Canada
5th September fly home in time for a wedding in Scotland on 8th September… It has literally just struck me that I probably need to book myself another flight here…
Those of you who know me will realise that not only is this exciting for me but it’s also flipping scary! The night I booked my flights I went home and of course what would be on TV that night but a documentary of a girl that got trafficked! I really felt scared for a while as I could only imagine what these girls have been put through and it really shook my heart to try to think what more we could do to stop the trafficking on human beings. All the more reason to donate to my charity this month, The Natasha’s Project.
But with a lot of advice from friends who have done this very route before, and after booking myself in for some Wing Chun self-defence classes (why do people keep laughing at me for this?!) I feel more confident and I know that this adventure will only build on my confidence.
I have never done a trip like this before so have no idea what to expect, but I am trying to keep an open mind.
I’ve finally given up!
Okay, I know the whole point to this month was not to give up and it’s been a pretty flipping tough month. But I have to tell you that there was one occasion which I decided to give up on something and I’m not sorry!
In the build up to Ryan leaving I wanted to surprise him with a trip to a theme park as I know he loves adrenaline. I picked the closest theme park to us not knowing that Chessington was more for the … younger … generation. But we went with hopes high that it will still be a laugh but to put it shortly the day was diabolical!
There was so much wrong that I had a list of about 12 bullet points to complain about, and I was so gutted because this was supposed to be a nice day together as a final goodbye.
So I pursued the normal lines of complaint but to no avail as they reassure me that over 2 hour queue times were normal and the animals were supposed to be running around with darts hanging off them. And after a lengthy email trail back and forth I was about ready to take a story to the papers, write a letter to the CEO, anything to hold Chessington accountable for actually providing value for money in their services. But then I remembered my month of positivity and thankfulness– one of my goals had been NOT to complain even when I rightfully should… So I decided to give up!
The Conclusion
Success rate: 70% (can’t really accurately measure this) Cost per fail: £2 Money raised for charity: £18
There were a number of things that I really wanted to pick up again and pursue but I didn’t get the opportunity to. One of these was the book I am writing, and have been for 4 years! But I am determined not to give up on it.
All in all, it’s been a real tough struggle and I still have a lot to learn, but I have had small victories which I will celebrate.
This month may have started with a hangover but it ends today in Costa with a Chai latte and my laptop as I continue planning for my challenge in May and adventure in June.
Ciao, peoples x
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